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Thinking about leaving an abusive relationship THINKING ABOUT
LEAVING
If you have decided to leave your abuser,
it is important that you access specialist support.

we won’t tell you
what to do.

but we can support you.

Leaving an abusive partner can be dangerous. Your abuser may become more abusive to try and regain control over you. It is very important that the abuser doesn’t find out you are considering leaving.

We can help you to understand your options and make a plan. We will give you information on specialist services in your community and help you find a refuge place.

In addition to getting support, you might want to consider:

create an emergency bag

If it is safe to do so without your abuser noticing, keep a bag with some cash, important documents (including birth certificates, marriage certificates, tenancy/mortgage documents, ID documents, National Insurance Number, driving licence), a set of keys, some clothes, any medication, phone charger and emergency numbers. This could be kept safe at a neighbour or friend’s house, so you can leave in a hurry and still have your essentials.

make a plan

Think about your partners’ routines and choose a safe time to leave your home. Consider where he will be, and plan a safe route – for example, you might want to avoid using a local taxi service in a small town, in case the driver tells your partner where you have gone.

arrange a place to stay

This might be the home of a trusted friend or family member, but make sure your abuser doesn’t know the location. Or you might want to go into a refuge. As a woman fleeing domestic abuse, you can seek housing advice from any local authority even if you do not live in the local area. Find out more about your housing options here.

consider ways he might track you

It is important to think about all the ways your partner might be able to find out where you are. For example, if you think your abuser might have access to your phone or messages, you could use a friend’s phone to make arrangements to leave, or buy a cheap ‘burner phone’. Similarly, you may need to delete any searches related to looking for support on your internet history. You should also turn off any geo-location settings on your phone. You can find more tips on keeping your technology safe and reducing the risk of tracking here.

safety when getting ready to leave

LDAS have created an information sheet that my help you if you are thinking about leaving. You can read this on the website of download save or print. If you download please remember to do so safely and to be certain your abuser cannot access this information. 

You can print our document and give to a trusted friend or relative to take care of if you are living with your abuser.

LDAS support.

our services are delivered by qualified and experienced staff who are experts in domestic abuse.

The approach to how we deliver our support is reviewed by survivors who tell us what works and what doesn’t. This ensures we deliver the best possible support to survivors in way that suits their needs.

Click on the links below for more information.

one to one support

Your dedicated support worker will listen to you and help create a safety and support plan and provide external advocacy to get you to where to you need to be to live a life free from abuse.

counselling

Your counsellor will work with you on weekly or fortnightly basis (dependent on you needs) this is usually for an hour. They can help you recover from the trauma you have endured.

group programmes

Our programmes provide a supportive environment which allow you to share and recover from your experiences whilst developing further understanding of your experiences.

bridge

Your dedicated Bridge Mentor will work with you at your pace. They are able support you to navigate what can often seem like complex systems to ensure you live in safe home and look forward to a happy future.

new horizons

Your support worker will help you to develop and build on your skills allowing you to plan for your future in learning, development or employment.

enterprise hub

Enterprise Hub offers high quality enterprise services and strategic engagement to ensure local residents can access support to assess their ideas and take them forward.

“I worked with my support worker to leave my partner when I felt it was safe and time was right with me. I was not pressured and felt supported every step of the way. They let me see how strong I was to survive this already and this spurned me on.”

we're here for you.

get support today.

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